JOKE-1
The first man says, "Your Honor, there has been a terrible mistake. I work at a stocking factory and tuck socks, so you see, I am a sock tucker." The judge told him he was free to go.
The second man stands and says, "Your Honor, there's a mistake here, too. I work in a cork plant and I wet the cork all day so that makes me a cork soaker". The judge dismisses this case, too.
Third man stands in front of the judge and claims his innocence. "Your honor, all I do is put Coca-Cola in bags, so I'm a Coke sacker".
The judge throws that one out and admonishes the bailiff, "What the hell is going on here? We've had a sock tucker, a cork soaker, a coke sacker . . ."
And the fourth man says, "Don't worry your honor, I'm what you thought those other three are!" [an error occurred while processing this directive]
JOKE-2
Jesus and Satan have an argument as to who is a better programmer. This goes on few hours. Until, they agree to hold a contest with vinayakar as judge.
They said themselves before their computers and begin they type furiously for several lines of code steaming up a screen. Seconds, before the end of the competition, a bolt of lighting strikes, taking away the electricity. Moments later, the power is restored, and vinayakar announced that the contest is over
He asked the Satan to show what he has come up with. Satan is visibly upset, and cries, "I have nothing!. I lost it when the power went out."
"Very well, then," says vinayakar, "Let us see if the Jesus has fared any better."
Jesus enter the command the screen comes to the life in VIVID display, with the voice of an angelic choir pouring forth form the speakers. The Satan is
astonished and stutters ."But how?!" I lost everything, yet
Jesus' program in intact! How did he do it?"
Vinayakar chuckles, "Jesus saves......"
JOKE-3
Once there was a divorce case in the court. The problem was with whom the child has to be.
The judge called the child and asked,
"Will you be with your mother?" The child said, no,my mother beats me. Then the judge asked whether the child wants to be with her father. The child again refuses saying that her father too beats her.
Annoyed by this judge asks the child, Then with whom do you want to be?
The child calmy replied," I wil be with the Indian Cricket Team. They never beat anyone"
City Guy: In this sports they will select "one man" who became first and they will give price for that man....
Village Guy: If they will give the price for only one man, then why they all running?
City Guy: ....!!!!
India cricket team arrived to airport fans waiting for them with angry becoz of failed tour.every players changed their getup and ran to some short way Ganguly weared a ladie dress and running one st one lady followed him and ask r u ganguly.how do u know me Ganguly asked she said "me tendulkar"
JOKE-6
He, then went and took his seat beside a caucasian lady and started having friendly talks with her....
Then, after a while it was dinner time, so Mr Singh opened up his bag and took out a tiffin box...
There was a nice aroma filling the place and that made the caucasian lady to ask him this..."excuse me , sir, but what is that u're having which smells so good". To which Mr Singh replied, "Oh mam, this is the grains of India".
Next, He took a bottle of butter milk and started drinking it without living even a single bit, and this amused the caucasian lady again and she asked him, "Sir, if u don't mind, what is that u're enjoying so much, what kind of drink is that". To which Mr singh replied, "Oh mam, this is the water of India".
A while later there was a foul smell coming from the side and to which the caucasian lady couldn't stand it and asked,
"oh my, what is that smell" to which Mr Singh replied, " oh mam, that is "Air India"...
B: yean?
A: Naam athekke pachai tanni uttrenalea.
There was a Japanese man who went to India for sightseeing. he hired a taxi and told the driver to drive to any Five star hotel. During the journey, a Honda overtook the taxi very fast. The japanese man saw out of the window excitedly and yelled, "Honda, very fast! Made in Japan!."
After a while, a Toyota overtook the taxi very fast again, the Japanese man saw out of the window and yelled, "Toyota, very fast! Made in Japan!" And then a Mitsubishi overtook the taxi. For the third time, the Japanese saw out of the window and yelled,"Mitsubishi, very fast! Made in Japan!"
The driver was a little angry, but he kept quiet. Finally, the taxi came to a Five star hotel. The fare was 800 rupees.
The Japanese exclaimed, "Wah... so expensive!" There upon, the driver yelled back, "Meter, very fast! Made in India!"
JOKE-9
Our Sardar, one day is at the railway station.
He asks one man "When will
Rajdhani Express go from here"?
Man Replies 12.30.
"When will Punjab Express go from here"?
Man Replies 10.30."When will Deccan Queen go from here"?
Man Replies 12.30.
Thus the sardar goes on asking for all the trains.
Now the man gets fed up and asks whether he wants
to go to punjab by train or not.
Sardar replies,
"NO. I only want to cross the tracks!"
JOKE-10
JOKE-11
ramu and somu was talking
Ramu: unnoda rich thaththa romba suyanalakkararame?
somu: aamam. thaan sethathitkappuram, adutha piraviyila porakkira avarukku thaan ella sothum seranum endru uyil ezhuthiirukkar endra parthukkoven
JOKE-12
calling from Hyderabad."